I'll Be a Monster if You'll Be Mine
by viansian
Summary: Skye has a minor break down when she learns of her heritage and Ward's there to comfort her (and maybe push her down a darker path towards him.)


_I'll be a monster if you'll be mine (our destines have always been intertwined) _

Rating: T (just because)

Summary: Skye has a minor break down and Ward's there to comfort her (any maybe push her down a darker path towards him.)

She was shaking and she couldn't stop. Her hands trembled uncontrollably from fear and something like disgust. Everything had happened so fast; it was just another mission, just a quick trip. She never expected to meet him.

Her father.

The monster that was her father.

She hadn't believed him at first. How could she be related to something as grotesque, as disgusting as him? She hadn't believed him, but he had told her some intriguing things.

He had told her about the universe, about a nearby planet that had been destroyed thousands of years ago. He had told her about his escape from that planet, about how he arrived on Earth, and disguised as a leper, traveled the world for hundreds of years. He told her of how he met her mother and turned her into a monster like him _(Except he didn't use the word monster, he never used the word monster. But she knew that was what he was.)_. He told her about how they had destroyed an entire village to get to her.

She hadn't believed him for a second. She had denied every word and told him to go to hell.

He told her to check in the hull of the Bus.

So there she stood. Staring at what would normally look like a mess of circles and lines, but she knew it was more than that. It was a code. And it strengthened her curiosity, and her curiosity eventually overcame her fear.

It wasn't that different from hacking a network.

Or programming a computer.

She had quickly realized that the code was programming for _something_. But as the pen slipped from her fingers, followed by the notebook she was writing in, and as she sunk to the floor, she realized what that programming was for.

It was for her. It was her DNA.

That was when she started shaking.

And that was when Ward found her.

She still hated him; heaven knows she still felt the pang in her chest every time she even glanced his way. And why Coulson allowed him back onto the team, she'd never know. But in that moment, she was glad it was him who found her. Not innocent, intelligent Simmons. Not still-recovering, yet still sharp Fitz. Not funny, clever Triplett. Not cold, strong May. Not kind, secretive Coulson, who seemed to be hiding this from her all along.

She was glad it was monstrous Ward who found her and wrapped his arms around her, telling her it was okay and whispering that she needed to breathe.

Breathe.

She had forgotten how to breathe the moment she'd realized he was a traitor. She'd forgotten how to feel the moment he told her what he felt for her was real. How many times she had wished that she had let Mike Peterson kill him; just let his heart stop and never bring him back.

But now? Now she knew that nothing would be able to comfort her like his arms. Nothing would be able to calm her like his soft voice and his gentle kisses across her face.

"It's all right," he whispered. "It's okay, Skye. Breathe. Just breathe. You're still you. Nothing's changed. It's all right."

So often had she dreamed of being in his arms again, only to banish the thoughts as soon as she remembered all that he'd done to their team, to _her_.

He had lied. He had lied about everything and betrayed them all. But at least he knew his sins. At least he embraced his dark side and didn't pretend to be something he wasn't.

"You knew, didn't you?" she choked out. It was the only explanation. The only way he could've possible known that she'd be down here. The only way he could know what to say.

There was a slight hesitation and she wondered if he would lie again. "I had an idea," he admitted. "Raina said something about your parents when I was with Garrett, about them being monsters. But I assumed they were both dead. I had no idea …" He trailed off and Skye felt him swallow. Though her father had only spoken to her, the rest of the team had seen him and he wasn't exactly a pretty sight.

There was silence as he simply held her, rocking back and forth softly on the ground. Finally she broke the silence, trying to hold the hysteria in her chest.

"I'm a monster. I'm biologically a monster."

"I'm a monster, too," Ward replied, his arms tightening slightly around her. She knew he was thinking about what she had said all those months ago in the diner. _Would you tell him to rot in hell?_ "Except I think I'm a bit worse because I chose to be a monster."

She had nothing to say, no reason to deny it, so Ward continued. "You're still you, Skye. Nothing's changed."

"Nothing's changed?" the hysteria began to creep into her voice. "Ward, I'm biologically not human!"

"And what does that change?" Ward pulled back and pushed the hair out of her face, looking into her wet eyes. "Does it change who you are? The choices you made? You are still a brilliant, beautiful hacktivist-turned-SHIELD agent you always have been. You may not be biologically human, but you have a soul, a conscious and a pure heart. You're by far the most human of everyone on this plane."

Skye stared at her former S.O. for a while, contemplating what he had said. Finally, she spoke. "I don't want them to know."

"You really think any of them could crack this code? And then trace it to you?" Ward snorted. "Not likely."

Shaking her head, Skye leaned into his arms. "Coulson's close. I…I can't have him find out."

Something in the back of her head was screaming. Screaming that she should leave this man who broke her heart into a thousand pieces, screaming that he was the last person she should be opening up to. But she pushed it down. She had missed his arms, his kisses, too much. What he said next shocked her, though.

"So, leave."

Her head jerked up. "What?" she asked, fear and apprehension in her voice.

He shrugged. "Leave. SHIELD is still in shambles. If there's any time to get off the radar, it's now. I'm not encouraging it, but it is an option."

"What would you do?" she countered, slight sarcasm in her voice.

He shrugged. "I'd leave. Get the hell off their charts while I still could. SHIELD can turn on you pretty fast, that tends to happen with an all-knowing secret government organization. When I first got away from Garrett, freedom terrified me. I didn't know what to do with it. I'd advise you take yours while you still can."

Nodding, Skye stood. "I'll plan to slip away as soon as we land." She picked up the pen and paper from the ground and glanced back at coded wall.

"I'm coming with you," Ward said. When she sent him a skeptical look, he shrugged and said, "Someone's got to protect you."

"I thought you were loyal to SHIELD," Skye countered. "That's what you've been telling everyone for the last ten months."

Stuffing his hands in his pockets, Ward's eyes never left hers. "I was never loyal to SHIELD."

"No?"

"No," he confirmed. "Only to you."

The silence that followed felt like an eternity before she replied, "Make sure you have your stuff ready."

Giving her a small nod, he suddenly looked down and chuckled.

"What?" she asked, perplexed that he could find something humorous in this situation.

"Just something that Raina told me once," he answered. A small smile danced at the corners of his mouth and a swirl of dark desire and something like a feral hunger brewed behind his eyes. "Maybe we'll be monsters together, huh?"


End file.
